Post image for Nicki Minaj Wears the Fuck Out of Latex…Also, Swallows

I love it when kinky things infiltrate pop culture. Back when I was 18, fresh faced and ready to get my BDSM on, the only place you would see a woman wearing a latex outfit was behind closed doors.

There are plenty of mainstream celebrities who have smothered their bodies in baby powder in order to show off every single curve imaginable…but I’m going to go out on a limb here and say that none of them has turned me on as much as the luscious ass of Nicki Minaj.

Nicki is on the top of her game all over again. She doesn’t have to do much to see the money roll in. That’s part of her charm, I guess. She’s rocking a few different outfits in the video for Jason Derulo’s new song Swalla. My favorite happens to be a figure hugging, blood red, latex bikini. Her verse starts at 2:25 in the below video, but if you skip ahead you’re going to be missing out on a whole lot of eye candy.
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Post image for Fap Along With Harlot: Pull Over and Fuck Me

I took a bit of a road trip last weekend. I needed to clear my head and get back to basics for a few hours. Even though I was all by myself, I can always keep myself occupied. I pulled over into a rest stop on the highway about 2 hours away from my house and started going at my pussy like it was going out of style. I had forgotten how much I loved cumming in my car. I guess since I used to do it so much at my old job, it kind of lost it’s novelty after doing it daily for 10 years.

When I got home from my solo jaunt, I decided to immediately jump onto PornHub to pull up some car porno to share with you Peepz. You ready to explode with me? Let’s Fap!

There’s a lot of conversation in this first clip. I’m usually a fan of videos that are all action, but the fact that the redhead in the driver’s seat masturbates with a toothbrush while she is driving was reason enough for me to include the clip in this post.


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Post image for About That Half-Naked Car Wash Guy: I Have Questions

Calico Rudasil is a feature columnist for Sssh.com, the award-winning porn site for women & couples. With over 18 years’ experience under her belt, writing about and for the adult entertainment industry, Calico qualifies as something of a Web Porn Dinosaur; similar to a tyrannosaurus, only with far more attractive arms and a less pronounced overbite.

Among the many routine errands I don’t relish running, a trip to the car wash has always seemed like the most postpone-worthy. Dirty fenders don’t reduce gas mileage significantly, and given what a hunk of junk my old beater is in the first place, I’m beyond feeling embarrassed by its outward filth. I’ve cleared the cab of fast food wrappers and receipts; anything more than that will just have to wait until the next time I pick up my parents at the airport.

Still, I hear lots of crazy, entertaining things happen at car washes these days, even ones not owned by Lenny Dykstra.

Just the other day, for example, a car wash in Pensacola was treated to a thrilling bit of half-naked performance art by one our nation’s cherished veterans. True, reviews of his performance were mixed, with some critics intrigued by the compelling arc of Charles William Raulerson’s presentation, while saying they would prefer not to have been threatened with a screwdriver.

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Post image for Throw Back Thursday Nudity Edition: Esme Bianco (2009)

Ah, the good ol’ days of Game of Thrones when the show was fresh enough and exciting enough to inspire a new generation of readers to pick up George R. R. Martin’s epic fantasy series A Song of Ice and Fire. 

These days the show still inspires a legion of rabid fans, but at the same time it has lost a little bit of it’s luster what with the fact that it seems like Martin will never actually get around to writing the next two book in the series.

Will we ever get The Winds of Winter and A Dream of Spring? The release date of TWOW keeps getting pushed back further and further, so at this point it doesn’t seem likely that the last two books of A Song of Ice and Fire will ever see the day.

Die hard fans can at the very least assuage their anxious trepidation for the books by watching the show and die hard fans of the show can await the seventh season by re-watching earlier seasons.

The first three seasons are especially stellar, because they feature one of my favorite characters: Ros, a prostitute of renown beauty played by Esme Bianco. Esme was the breakout star in the first few seasons as far as I’m concerned. Her beauty was only matched by her wit. The fact that she was killed off by that little shit Joffrey was a hard pill to swallow.

One of the best scenes of the entire show is when Littlefinger gives Ros and a new prostitute he just hired for his brothel a little class on how to get it on and get their clients off. It’s freaking hot and creepy and hot. My favorite combo!

Check out this photoshoot Esme Bianco did with Kristoffer Myhre a few years before Game of Thrones ever aired. You can see why they hired her to play Ros.

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Post image for Say Hello To Honey Gold Your New Favorite Porn Star!!!

You all know Mark Spiegler, right? He’s the man behind Spiegler Girls  one of the top talent agencies in the adult industry. He represents hotties such as Asa Akira, Riley Reid, Annika Albrite, Kira Noir, and AJ Applegate. It’s a good thing his agency is so well regarded, because the dude’s website looks like it was designed by some guy living in his mom’s basement. Shit needs to be updated STAT.

Anyhow, I was looking through Spiegler Girls the other day looking for new faces and that’s where I discovered Honey Gold.

“Spieglergirls don’t get fucked on camera. They DO the fucking!”

It was love at first sight. Honey Gold is GORGEOUS! You’ll invariably notice that she has that Skin Diamond vibe what with her alt style, but Honey is not a pale imitation, she’s her own woman through and through and there’s not one doubt in my mind that she’s about to blowup up all over the porn scene.

Honey Gold made her porn debut in January and her first scene with Burning Angel was released at the beginning of the month of March. That’s right, her first scene isn’t even a month old and people are already going nuts for this woman.

Honey’s first scene was with Small Hands (a.k.a. Joanna Angel’s husband) and at the time of filming he was only the third man she had ever had sex with. Crazy, right? I think it’s kind of cute, apparently she asked Joanna if it was okay and Joanna assured her that the whole have-sex-with-my-husband-while-I-watch-and-direct thing was totally normal. After that, things went really well to hear Honey tell it.

“They didn’t know what to expect from me and I was very thankful they were willing to be the first company to book me,” Gold says. “The chemistry and the dynamic in the scene is absolutely beautiful and one thing I liked about him is he allowed me to be myself because I can be very submissive, but I can also be very dominant.

“And he’s the only guy who let me smack him, ever, in my personal life or on camera. And the thrill of that was exciting. I absolutely loved it. I didn’t know I was capable of doing anything that I did during the scene until I did that scene. Like everything was just kind of carnal instinct which helped make it beautiful.”

Honey’s second scene was a triple blowjob with Chloe Couture, Leigh Raven, and Isiah Maxwell for Throated. You wouldn’t believe it after watching that scene, but that was the first time Honey Gold ever deep-throated someone, especially someone as big as Isiah Maxwell.

I’m not sure how many scenes Honey has done so far, but her fourth and latest scene (as of mid-March) was with Spanish sensation Ramon Nomar for Axel Braun’s Inked 3. I’m kind of curious about that scene, because I read Axel thought it would be funny/sexy if Ramon only spoke to Honey in Spanish the whole time so that she wouldn’t know what to expect and the two could have a really dynamic scene together.

I wish Greg Lansky worked with tattooed pornstars. I’d love to see Honey Gold do a scene for Blacked or Tushy.

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Last Week On Insta: Kira Noir, Taylor Hill, & More +++

March 22, 2017
Thumbnail image for Last Week On Insta: Kira Noir, Taylor Hill, & More +++

I’m having one of those days where work is making me super horny. Imagine trying to get things done when all you want to do is rub one out? It’s not very productive. I should just give up or turn my office chair into a sex machine. I’m sure I could find a way to […]

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Revenge Of The GIFs With Megan Rain

March 21, 2017
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Make it rain. Make it rain. Or, you know, Megan Rain. Megan Rain makes it rain semen. Semen ALL OVER THE PLACE. Actually, Megan Rain chose that particular moniker, because she kind of looks like Megan Fox and she can squirt like a power hose. Truth be told, I have never seen her squirt so […]

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Pxie Revolutionizes The Hair Brush In “Spank” By Higinio Domingo

March 21, 2017
Thumbnail image for Pxie Revolutionizes The Hair Brush In “Spank” By Higinio Domingo

Long dark hair, striking eyebrows, piercing eyes, fair skin, pouty red lips… I mean this is my high school fantasy girl come to life, I tell ya. And with a spanking fetish to boot. I’m pretty much in heaven. Oh, I’m reminded of a story in Alison Tyler’s Wonderland where little riding hood is a […]

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Sex News: Pornhub Plow, Space Sex, & Porn Is Kinkier

March 20, 2017
Thumbnail image for Sex News: Pornhub Plow, Space Sex, & Porn Is Kinkier

The Fappening Part Two is happening as I’m sure you’ve heard by now. I’m conflicted. On one hand, I want to share the pics, because I’m a perv and that shit generates a lot of traffic, but on the other hand I don’t know how I feel about perpetuating the whole let’s-violate-someone’s-privacy shtick. That said, […]

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Monday Morning Jerk Before Work: Have You Met Lyra Law?

March 20, 2017
Thumbnail image for Monday Morning Jerk Before Work: Have You Met Lyra Law?

Before getting into good ol’ regular hardcore porn, Lyra Law worked as a dominatrix out of her own dungeon in downtown L.A. I mention this, because when Lyra did her first interviews at AVN in 2015 she hadn’t even shot her first scenes yet, but it wasn’t like the tall, leggy blonde was a stranger […]

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