Post image for Inappropriate Things To Do With Your Dick On The Subway

My Fetlife profile used to be plastered with the statement, “DON’T SEND ME PICTURES OF YOUR DICK!” and, “NO REALLY, YOUR COCK PICS ARE NOT WELCOME HERE!” or even, “IF YOU TRY TO STICK YOUR DICK IN MY EYE WITH A PHOTOGRAPH, I’LL BE HELLA PISSED. DON’T DO IT. SERIOUSLY.”

All that drama llama only made dudes think that I was using reverse psychology on them. So I ended up with an inbox filled with peen.

Here’s the thing…I obviously don’t mind sharing pictures of my genitals with people consensually. What bugs me out is thinking that I want to see your no-no parts at random parts of the day. It’s obnoxious honestly.

I read about something even worse than an unsolicited dick pic in my DMs though…
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Post image for Fap Along With Harlot: Mean Girls Get Freaky

Why are mean girls so sexy? I love a confident bitch who won’t take bullshit from anyone. When I get all riled up and start talking nasty, I always end up getting soaked. It’s the adrenaline pumping through my system and the anger and frustration building up…as soon as I start acting like a cunt, I’m turned on.

This week, I figured that we should all fap together with some of the meanest bitches in the business. You Peepz ready to all that bad stuff out of your system? Let’s go!

When these two schoolgirls get caught dyking out in the showers, their principal (Princess Donna) takes matters (and pussies) into her own hands to teach them a lesson. Gangbangs for punishment anyone?


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Calico Rudasil is a feature columnist for Sssh.com, the award-winning porn site for women & couples. With over 18 years’ experience under her belt, writing about and for the adult entertainment industry, Calico qualifies as something of a Web Porn Dinosaur; similar to a tyrannosaurus, only with far more attractive arms and a less pronounced overbite.

To be honest, most of the hot, fleeting trends which come along in the world of adult entertainment don’t interest me very much as a porn viewer. My tastes and kinks were set in erotic stone long ago, and I’m more inclined to watch old favorites again than explore territory which is truly new to me.

Still, every so often along comes a trend which piques my curiosity, even if it doesn’t touch on a specific sexual fantasy or desire of mine.

I’m experiencing such curiosity right now, as I read about “bespoke porn,” an area examined in recent podcasts from journalist/documentary filmmaker Jon Ronson.

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Post image for Ask A Porn Star: “How Far Did You Get In School?”

The idea that porn stars are an uneducated lot is one of the most pervasive stereotypes that people in the porn industry still have to face today. I mean, the words “blonde bimbo” roll off the tongue for a reason and not just because they both start with the letter “b.”

A lot of people have misguided views of the sex industry and one of those views is that you have to be an idiot to be a porn star, because who would want to have sex on camera for money if they could earn their living as a CPA? And the only reason there aren’t more CPAs is that people are bad at math, or… at least, that’s what all the misguided Peepz thinks. So, obviously, if you’re doing porn you’re bad at math, which makes you an idiot. (Those last few sentences made all the sense.)

Clearly, that’s a load of crap. You’d be surprised to find out how many porn stars are certified public accountants. (Hi, Veruca James!) It seems like accounting leads to porn. Also, psychology. Lots of psychology grads. (Hi, Alison Rey!) Oh and let’s not forget the Fine Arts grads. (Hi, Amarna Miller and Mickey Mod!) My favourite, though is Missy Martinez, because she’s certified to perform autopsies and I find that really interesting.

Pornstars in order of appearance: Missy Martinez, Rizzo Ford, Harley Jade, Sophia Grace, Alison Rey, Stevie Foxx, Rain DeGrey, Amarna Miller, Riley Reyes, Cindy Starfall, April O’Neil, Ela Darling, Aubrey Snow, Amber Ivy, Brian Street Team, Trinity St. Clair, Vyxen Steel, Mickey Mod, Claire Robbins, Aiden Starr, Nikki Next, Dava Foxx, Veruca James, Mick Blue, Leya Falcon, Kenzie Taylor, August Ames, Dixie Comet, Allie Haze, Anikka Albrite, Star Nine, Lauren Phillips, Kassondra Raine, Jade Nile, Daisy Layne, and Aaron Wilcoxxx. 

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Post image for Manon Le Botlan’s Tits & I Are In A Serious Relationship!

Have you Peepz ever heard of The Undress? It was popular on Kickstarter a few years ago. Basically, it’s a large dress that you slip over your sports/swim gear and it has these weird side openings that you can use to pull your bottoms on and off without flashing the whole world.

Basically, it’s the invention that is going to put all the beach paparazzi out of business. All the weirdos with a camera hiding in the bushes waiting for the hotties to change out of their bikinis will need to find new careers, or, at least, parlay their skills into legit jobs like porn.

I’m definitely not suggesting that beach paps should start peeping into people’s windows. It might look like these pics of Manon Le Boltan where taken by a disgruntled paparazzi who said “Fuck the beach and The Undress, I’m moving on to peeping through windows,” but I can assure you that they were taken by a legit photographer. Probably. Most likely. I hope.

On one hand, I’m thinking let’s burn all The Undresses, because accidental nudity is what I live for. But on the other hand, I’m thinking I should probably buy one. No kidding, I was just at the beach and I pulled my usual move, which is flash everyone while sort of hiding under a towel. I swear, if I was famous my boobs would be all over the internet.

Oh wait, I’m not famous and my boobs are already all over the internet.

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Sex News: Kissing Angles, Nipples Are Not Free, & Sex Doll Art

August 15, 2017
Thumbnail image for Sex News: Kissing Angles, Nipples Are Not Free, & Sex Doll Art

People Are Hard-Wired to Turn to the Right When We Kiss (Broadly) New research has revealed what many of us already knew: that men like to dominate kissing, much the same as they like to dominate everything else. A team of researchers from the universities of Dhaka, Bath, and Bath Spa set out to conduct […]

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Top 10: GIFs Of Women Sucking On Fingers Because It’s Hot AF!

August 14, 2017
Thumbnail image for Top 10: GIFs Of Women Sucking On Fingers Because It’s Hot AF!

Women sucking on fingers, their own or other people’s, is super fucking hot! A psych grad should really try to investigate why finger sucking is such a turn on. I’m sure it would make for an interesting thesis. You know, something or other about the id and the ego. Throw an oral fixation in there […]

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Monday Morning Jerk Before Work: Have You Met Olive Glass?

August 14, 2017
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The first time I laid eyes on Olive Glass she was gracing the cover of Penthouse Magazine. One look at the dark-haired vixen and I knew it was love. She has the looks to be a major player in the porn industry, but unfortunately, her career has never quite taken off. I blame it on […]

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Last Week On Insta: Kato Punk, Rihanna, & More +++

August 13, 2017
Thumbnail image for Last Week On Insta: Kato Punk, Rihanna, & More +++

Every. Last. Single. Body. Part. Of. The. Female. Body. Is. Incredible. $25 and up gets you a full-res download of this set on Patreon (click the link in bio 👆) or just hang on for a few more days to see it on Stylerotica.com this Saturday. Shot by @_d_punk in Vegas. This is my first […]

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Boobs Are Nice But They Also Suck Sometimes

August 12, 2017
Thumbnail image for Boobs Are Nice But They Also Suck Sometimes

My boobs are big, but they aren’t huge. When I was trying to film actual porno movies (not just maintain my amateur porno pseudo-empire) I was actually told that they weren’t big enough to shoot BBW porno. Whatevs. They work for me…except that boob sweat is real and one of the most terrible parts of […]

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