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I’m having a lot of bondage fantasies and watching a lot of BDSM themed porno but my sex life with my girlfriend is pretty vanilla, how can I get some kinkier shit going in the bedroom without scaring her off or freaking her out?
- De Sade Wanna Be
Hi De Sade -
Have you tried talking to her about it? Now is a better time than ever, since those 50 Shades books are so popular. The key here is like most new things in bed, you have to introduce them gradually, make sure your partner’s first experience with it (whatever IT is) is a positive, enjoyable one.
Since you’re describing your sex life with her as vanilla, I think that you should ease her into this gradually. She may take a liking to it right away, or at least enjoy how much it turns you on. Once she has a little idea, and you have an idea of how she’ll respond, you can take it up a notch. Who knows? She may have a Ms. De Sade just waiting to come out.
just remember- SAFE WORD. ; )
xo,
j
World famous adult star and sex educator jessica drake is here every week to answer your questions about sex, dating, the world of adult entertainment. While waiting for the next installment why not see more of jessica over at WickedPictures.com
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Do you have your own question or problem you want advice on? Just leave it in the comments section below. If you prefer to email your questions, send them to the Peeperz editor at bucky@peeperz.com and he’ll forward them on to jd. Be sure to check out the previous installments of the column at this link: Ask jd.
