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You are reading Ask jd – Where every week we get the answers from the pro herself via our sex, dating, and relationships, advice column with adult entertainment legend/sex educator jessica drake.
Hi jessica:
My boyfriend and I really want to have a threesome with another girl, I’ve slept with other women before, I’m pretty bi but I’ve never had a threesome. What we’re wondering is should we sit down with our third and plan it all out, I mean plan the sexy sex? There’s a lot that could happen with all three of us and I’m scared if we don’t plan it it’ll just be a be big gropey mess. But I’m also scared if we like plan it too much that’ll ruin it.
– Alice
Hi Alice-
Great question. I love that you already know that you like girls, and the fact that you consider having a “team meeting” before the big event is really smart…but your instinct is pretty spot-on as well. Too much planning could take away the spontaneity that makes adventurous sex so much fun.
I do think it’s a good idea to sit down with your guy and tell him what you consider OK and what you’d consider off limits, but other than that, you should just go with what feels good, as long as everyone is having fun. Besides, even with lots of pre-planning, things happen (or things don’t happen) during sex that can change the plan anyway, so go with the flow and enjoy yourself.
xo,
j
PS- i’ve been in a few “gropey mess” threesomes, and even they were kind of fun too ; )
See more of jessica drake over at WickedPictures.com
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