I’m a guy in my late 30s and I’ve been married for a few years and I’ve recently started becoming really turned on watching cuckolding porn. My wife and I have a great relationship, if a little vanilla in the bedroom. I’d love to have my wife experiment with cuckolding me, where I’m “forced” to watch her sleep with another man, but I don’t know how to broach the subject. What should I do?
- Potential Cuck
That’s definitely an interesting question to ponder, it’s certainly a harder subject to address because there’s a lot at play. It plays around to a certain extent with changing your relationship structure by opening it up to other people, but it also has the potential to introduce a totally different power dynamic.
It’s important in this case for you to think about different ways in which your fantasies could be addressed and try to see what levels of actual cuckolding would be necessary. Sometimes what sound hot in your head might be very difficult for you in reality. There’s no absolute way of knowing how this would play out without trying, but I think it’s valuable to look at your options and consider a scaled-back fantasy to bring up. This might be having her flirt in front of you at a bar, or doing something online, or maybe just talking about it to each other in a role playing context.
Once you’ve decided what would work for you, you actually have to bring it up to her. This part will require a lot of sensitivity, but also a lot of bravery to address it. Start by slipping cuckolding into the conversation in a sexual context: this can be mentioning that you read something about it, or you saw a cuckolding video or even that you had a dream about it. See how she reacts, and proceed keeping this in mind.
Mention that this cuckolding stuff aroused you. Again, see how she reacts. No matter how she reacts, you do need to carry on, but watching these reactions will help you frame the way you talk about your fantasy. No matter what, you need to be direct, but you can ease up on details and talk in more abstract terms if she’s uncomfortable, or go a bit more specific if she seems open to the idea.
You need to get to the point of telling her that this is something you’d like to explore, but in baby steps and always respecting her comfort and timeline. Maybe she’ll be into trying some type of low-pressure mutual fantasy right off the bat, in which case, have fun and still go slow! If not, offer her time to think about it, and come back to the topic again in a couple of weeks.
Make sure to make it clear that this is about sexual fulfillment and exploration, not about changing the structure of your relationship. Continue to discuss openly and respectfully, with the ultimate timeline of wanting to try some degree of mutual fantasy after three talks. Once you get to that third talk (if it takes that long) propose this babystep and see. If she says no, take it off the table. If she says yes, proceed with caution and gradually amp up.
Regardless of how this plays out, if your ultimate goal is to have your wife have sex with someone else, be prepared for the fact that this might never happen, or at least not for a while. Enjoy whatever degree of fantasy you agree on and hopefully it’ll happen. Make sure to treat her well and to give her the kind of sex and dynamic that she likes in spades, don’t fixate on this exclusively. She’ll be more inclined to go for it if you show that you can still be the husband she knows and loves as well.
If and when it does happen, make sure to be safe, you may have fantasies about unprotected sex as part of this, but you shouldn’t be taking any risks. Everyone should get tested and condoms are always encouraged. The more you all feel safe in every way, the better this will end up.
It may sound like a long road, but certain fetishes aren’t a walk in the park from the get go. Respecting each other will help your relationship to flourish.
Every week here on Peeperz.com, Camille Crimson tackles sex advice, tips, techniques, and your questions about the adult industry. Camille’s the stunning, curvy, redhead who is the face, the voice, and the mouth, of TheArtofBlowjob.com. She’s also at the helm of the beautiful porn movement, espousing the idea that porn can be sensual, respectful and beautiful… but still be really really hot! If you want to ask her anything leave it in the comment’s section below and hit up the previous installments here: Q & A With Camille Crimson