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Don’t get me wrong; I wrestle daily with my ambivalent feelings about porn parodies. Are they scraping the bottom of the barrel? Are they blazing a trail? But then I realize that thinking too much about porn gives me hives, so I just enjoy it.
What is indisputable is that parodies have breathed new life into porn, and the people largely responsible for this upsurge, X-Play’s Jeff Mullen and Scott David, were on hand for the filming of their latest porn adaptation, “This Ain’t M*A*S*H XXX.”
Producer David went to several rental houses, thrift stores, and boutiques in the month of preproduction for the show, starring 2010 AVN Best Actor Eric Swiss as Hawkeye. It was Swiss’ performance in X-Play’s “This Ain’t Married with Children XXX” that won him the trophy.
“We had some disagreements about the character,” said Swiss of his discussions about Hawkeye with director Mullen (whose porn alias is Will Ryder).
I felt this was funny, you know, talking about character when he’s just about to fuck a couple of 19-year-olds, but then realized he was serious.
“Are you playing Hawkeye like Donald Sutherland or Alan Alda?” I asked, looking at his Alda wig.
“Donald Sutherland,” he said.
“Have you seen the movie ‘M*A*S*H’?” I asked.
“No,” he said.
I consoled myself that Swiss won an award for his acting, and he was going to do fine.
Cavorting about the set were Brianna Blair, Chanel Preston, Alexa Jaymes, and Krissy Lynn, who is playing “Hot Lips” Houliham/ They had just shot an operating room scene (“I couldn’t believe I scored those gurneys,” said David) in which Preston had a boob job.
Again, to question these things would make my head hurt. The important thing is, the footage looks great and the girls are hot, and the producers have the verisimilitude down to the guy playing Radar having injured fingers (the original movie and sitcom’s Radar, Gary Burghoff, was missing a finger).
Having been on several parody sets, I know that the various directors do things differently. Mullen/Ryder has a big cast and crew on this one, and David has outdone himself on production design. The set was buzzing with invited guests, the cast ate hot plate lunches, and an older actor named James Bartholet was dressed in drag as Klinger.
“Why are my nipples hard?” he said as he pressed against Brianna Blair, who cringed. They were already getting into character!
“This Ain’t M*A*S*H XXX” will be released early this summer.
