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I’m ALIVE! I’ve been sick for the last week. Did anyone miss me? Did anyone notice I was gone in the first place? Probably not. To be fair, you probably come here looking for spank material, not because you love reading the anecdotes of Lola Byrd (that’ me, in case you’ve already forgotten).
Bucky noticed though, but that’s probably because he’s my boss and all he got from me was an email saying I was sick and then I didn’t bother showing up for a week. Good thing he’s not as strict in the boardroom as he is in the bedroom, because my ass might have been fired. Hell, he didn’t even complain when I dutifully ignored the many emails he sent to inquire if I was still alive.
That’s enough of that, because baby, I’m back – with golden showers – just like the little blonde girl in Poltergeist ominously predicted (they cut that part out of the movie) and I have to pee like a racehorse, because I had a large iced lemonade this morning. Breakfast of champions and golden shower aficionados world wide.
5. Paperboy
In Paperboy, Nicole Kidman plays a woman who at one point pees on Zac Efron, because the poor dude gets stung by a jellyfish. I haven’t seen it, so I can’t give you the particulars, but apparently the camera is right up in there and you can see Nicole’s piss stream. A good day for golden shower lovers everywhere:
“Nicole Kidman looms over a supine Zac Efron, cries out, ‘If anyone’s gonna pee on him, it’s gonna be me,’ and then squirts an impressive stream of urine onto the High School Musical star’s face and bare chest.”
4. The L Word
Jenny and Carmen are lovers. Jenny and Carmen are taking a shower together. A naked Jenny gets out of the shower (duh, she was in the shower) and heads on over to the toilet because she has to pee. Carmen, also naked, follows in Jenny’s footsteps, because she also has to pee (and apparently people in TV shows don’t pee in the shower). “I still have to pee,” Jenny says. Carmen not minding in the slightest straddles Jenny and tells her to spread her legs. They fuck, and grind, and pee. The order isn’t clear, but it’s hot and nobody cares.
3. Ricky Martin
Back in 2006, before Ricky Martin came out of the closet he told Blender Magazine: ”I love giving the golden shower … I’ve done it before in the shower. It’s like so sexy, you know, the temperature of your body and the shower water is very different.” He immediately wished he hadn’t mentioned it when conservative leaders in Puerto Rico wanted him to step down from his charitable children’s foundation. In a statement posted on his web page, he said he never thought his interview “would lead us to an absurd political discussion that has become sensationalist.”
2. Girls
If you haven’t seen HBO’s new hit series Girls, you should. Sure, it might be elitist and privileged, but it’s also funny. Hannah, the shows protagonist, finally lands the weird-ass Adam as her boyfriend only to get offended when he decides to take a piss on her while they’re in the shower. Gawd, some girls just don’t know what they want.
1. John Mayer
My neighbor’s cousin’s friend’s sister’s nephew’s girlfriend heard from Perez Hilton who heard from Howard Stern that John Mayer really likes to pee on his partners during sex. Clearly, my sources are foolproof on this one, but I’ll leave it up to you to decided whether Jennifer Aniston was at one time covered in John Mayer’s pee or not.
Bonus: Porn
Skinny teen, playing with her ass and pissing brought to you by PornHub
