Post image for Don’t Put Wasp Nests Into Your Pussy …Science!

My wife and I were having lunch at a new burger place in town. We were discussing the pros and cons of sweet potato fries vs. regular old boring french fries (I’m team sweet potato fry, FWIW) and these two college age women sat in the booth behind us. When you’re in a situation like that, you can’t help but overhear conversations, especially when they take a turn for the vagina.

The blonde with blue sunglasses said, “Listen, she said that she swears by the stuff. It tingles a little bit when she inserts it, but after a few minutes everything is cool. She said that Mike totally noticed a difference.”

“There is no fucking way that is scientific,” the blonde with aviators replied, “You itch from wasp stings because of poison in the stinger. THAT’S probably why it burns.”

My wife dropped her fry in surprise. I nibbled as quietly as I could on the bacon and blue cheese burger in front of me. Eavesdropping is difficult when you’re trying not to giggle.

“It’s not the wasp,” blue sunglasses said, “It’s just the nest. And not like, a chunk of it…you use one of those things to turn it into a powder and then you wipe it on your lips.”

The way that she half whispered, “Your lips,” had me figuring that she meant pussy lips, not face lips.
CLICK HERE TO READ MORE STUPIDITY

{ 0 comments }

Post image for Pornhub Insights On Searches During Fortnite Server Outage

Earlier this year we talked about the sexy, cell shaded world of Fortnite porn after a streamer made headlines when he played the exciting survival game with Canadian rap superstar Drake. The statisticians at Pornhub Insights were quick to drop in on this trend and equip us with all the data we needed to understand the fascination.

Far be it for me to question the sexual allure of a video game character. I once masturbated to the 8 pixels that made up Princess Zelda’s body and totally get why some people would find characters from a modern third-person shooter to be sexy. That being said, I also suspect it has something to do with the game’s popularity on video game streaming services and the tendency for these streamers to be gorgeous busty women in lowcut shirts.

When Fortnite experienced a server outage for a full 24 hours, streamers as well as regular players were forced to take a break from scavenging for weapons and building materials leaving many people looking for an alternate source of entertainment.

According to an all new report from Pornhub Insights those people apparently returned to the warm bosom of Fortnite pornography searches to pass the time, and they have compiled some graphs to highlight their findings.

CLICK FOR THE REST OF THIS POST

{ 0 comments }

Post image for GQ Says It’s Cool to Fuck on Your Couch

I used to have a sex couch. It was repulsively disgusting and covered in the fluids of so many lovers that sometimes, when my apartment heated up, it smelled like funk. I was gross in my early 20s.

Nasty, filthy and gross.

That’s why I got laid all the time…and why I ended up sharing the love and creating porno for the world to enjoy.

There are a bazillion videos that feature my Sex Couch because no bodily fluids were allowed on my for real couch…but you could shoot spunk all God damn dan on the Sex Couch. When I finally got rid of it during a movie, I had to make up, “I spilled a crock pot of soup,” lies because my step-dad and mom were asking about the stains.

Don’t judge me. The Sex Couch was always a party and everyone was invited.

CLICK HERE FOR COUCH FUCKING PERMISSION

{ 0 comments }

Post image for Hacker Changes Train Station Kiosk To Display Pornhub

One of the most important features of a thriving metropolis is a clean, modern public transportation system. Politicians love to have an efficient and reliable means of transit to impress tourists and to make life easier for those who live or work in the city.

That being said, waiting for a train or bus to arrive is really boring regardless of how nice it is.

While it’s not quite as bad as spending hours in traffic getting to work, standing around a train station can be a monotonous way to start your day. Though some may use the time to read or play on their phone, the average street savvy commuter knows to always keep an eye on their surroundings- otherwise you may miss the porn.

Earlier this month at the Yagan Square train station in Perth, Australia, a hacker compromised a touch screen kiosk and changed the display from an information application to the front page of Pornhub. The station is part of long running project to create a public facility that politicians promised would be the “heart of the city.” Thanks to the poor security on a publicly accessible computer it also briefly became Perth’s throbbing erection. Noice.

CLICK FOR THE REST OF THIS POST

{ 0 comments }

Post image for Vintage Harlot: My First Ginger Cock at Work

Over the years, there have been at least two dozen Ginger (red haired…you Peepz know that lingo, yes?) lovers whose appendages have crossed my pussy lips in one way or another. It was a novelty at first, but the fascination slowly worked it’s way into a pseudo fetish. If I saw a ginger across the room, I was going to fuck them as long as they were down.

My first ginger experience left me wanting more, mostly because I didn’t cum. When wee tried messing around initially, there were still customers in the store. He was hella nervous about fucking his boss and ticking that box off of his sexual bucket list, so we decided to give it another go after the store closed.

After hours, I counted all the money in the office while my staff straightened up the store. When I had finished up my actual work for the night, I picked up the phone to announce over the loudspeaker that everyone was good to go, except the red-haired man because his drawer was short. He let the other employees out the front door and I watched him take a deep breath, hesitating before he knocked on the office door.
CLICK HERE FOR MORE REAL FUCKING

{ 0 comments }

Masturbation Roll

April 21, 2018
Thumbnail image for Masturbation Roll

Peeperz presents to you the best sites on the entire internet: Demi Lovato Bikini Booty of the Day – DrunkenStepfather Maitland Ward Begging For It In Her Latest Nude Pics – CelebJihad Ariel Winter Big Boobs & Pasties at Coachella – TaxiDriverMovie Rihanna See Through for Coachella! – The Nip Slip Beyonce Earned Her Crown […]

Read the full article →

Fap Along With Harlot: The Gift

April 21, 2018
Thumbnail image for Fap Along With Harlot: The Gift

Every other Fap Along list that I’ve done has included five videos. I talk a little bit about the theme and then we go on a masturbation vacation with each other. I want to change it up this time around…just this once. Because this clip that we’re about to share with each other is fucking […]

Read the full article →

They Needed A Study To Tell Us THAT?

April 20, 2018
Thumbnail image for They Needed A Study To Tell Us THAT?

Calico Rudasil is a feature columnist for Sssh.com, the award-winning porn site for women & couples. With over 18 years’ experience under her belt, writing about and for the adult entertainment industry, Calico qualifies as something of a Web Porn Dinosaur; similar to a tyrannosaurus, only with far more attractive arms and a less pronounced […]

Read the full article →

Pornhub Insights On Overwatch’s Brigitte Porn

April 19, 2018
Thumbnail image for Pornhub Insights On Overwatch’s Brigitte Porn

After nearly two years I’m always impressed that Overwatch is still a thing. Between Blizzard’s penchant for drastically overhauling already balanced gameplay every few months and one of the most toxic player bases I’ve ever experienced, I constantly tell myself I’m going to move on to a new game only to realize I don’t like […]

Read the full article →

Naked Man With Toy Stuck In Butt Wanders Gas Station For Help

April 18, 2018
Thumbnail image for Naked Man With Toy Stuck In Butt Wanders Gas Station For Help

Anal play has a fairly negative stereotype for most men. Homophobia dictates that enjoying prostate stimulation is something only gay men do and is therefore frowned upon for heterosexuals. However, the fallacy of that argument is that it feels good regardless of your sexual orientation and what I do in the privacy of my home […]

Read the full article →