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Calico Rudasil is a feature columnist for Sssh.com, the award-winning porn site for women & couples. With over 18 years’ experience under her belt, writing about and for the adult entertainment industry, Calico qualifies as something of a Web Porn Dinosaur; similar to a tyrannosaurus, only with far more attractive arms and a less pronounced overbite.

Back in the days before I worked from home, I worked in an office that was a short commute from home – 15 minutes most days, about 10 more when traffic was heavy.

I’ve often wondered if the short drive – and corresponding lack of time to recalibrate my emotional state from “God, work sucks” to “Yay I’m home!” – was part of why my husband could gauge what sort of day I’d had at work so easily and quickly upon my arrival home. Sometimes, I wouldn’t even have said a word yet and he’d ask: “Rough day at work?”

I like to think I did a pretty good job of putting work out of my mind by later the same evening, though. By the time we’d finished eating dinner, unless he asked me about work again, it was out of sight/out of mind. And if it wasn’t, I’d do my best to pretend work wasn’t on my mind, just to spare my spouse the burden of the same work-related bullshit that was weighing me down.

One thing I tried to never do was to let work-related stress mess with our sex life. To the contrary, sex was a great way to put my focus on something good and positive – and to quickly forget whatever work-crap it was that had stressed me out in the first place.

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Pornhub Goes BeeSexual

by Alpha Harlot on April 17, 2019

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Saving the bees is really fucking important, Peepz. My inlaws are weekend beekeepers so we’ve always got fresh honey in the house. Before I met my wife, I really wasn’t educated on the importance of bees though.

Bees are dying at an alarming rate and Pornhub has stepped up to the plate to educate the masses. Since they’re in the porno business, they’ve brought along your favorite stars of the adult industry for the ride. They created the BeeSexual Pornhub Channel in order to raise awareness and get the cash flowing into the pockets of the charities that want to save the bees. The videos are of bees doing bee stuff, but pornstars do voice overs and it’s fucking hilarious.

Here’s Abela Danger to talk to you a bit about the cause:

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Is Your Sex Long Enough?

by Alpha Harlot on April 16, 2019

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For most of my life, forty-five seconds is about all it took for me to orgasm when I focused.  Obviously I know exactly how I like to be touched and what I like to be touched with, but even when I’m with a lover, it took much less time for me to climax than the average person.  Some people (most guys, if I’m being honest) thought this was great, but not being able to edge myself definitely took a toll on how I was able to experience sex.

If you ask the average person, they’ll say that they want men to take a long time before orgasm.  If a woman is involved in the scenario, it’s bonus points if she cums quickly. So premature ejaculation bad, quick cumming ladies good. If I had to gather a guess as to this twisting frame of thinking we’ve been forced to believe, it’s probably because the “manly” thing to do is to last for hours but because it takes a little longer to get to know lady bits, getting that over and done with as quickly as possible is the name of the game.

Ah patriarchy…there you are!

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I’m impressed with Jennifer Lopez.  Her music was never really my scene, but if you ask me the lyrics to any of her hit songs, I bet that I can spit out at least 80% of them.  She’s always been a force in entertainment, whether she’s acting, singing or dancing.

JLo can basically do whatever the fuck she wants with her career at this point and people will eat it up.  There has been some news floating around about Hustlers, a movie that she’s starring in with Cardi B, Julia Styles, Constance Wu, Keke Palmer, Lili Reinhart and Madeline Brewer (of Handmaid’s Tale fame).  Hustlers is about a group of strippers that decide to get revenge on some of wealthy clients. There’s really not too much information about the plot available yet, but you had me at JLo and strippers.  

Keeping up with the theme of her work for this year, her new video for her French Montana colab Medicine was released the other day and it’s full of hotness including a stripper pole and plenty of asses.

Here’s a look at the video:

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More or Less Sex

by Alpha Harlot on April 8, 2019

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I had a dream last night that I was hanging out with my coworkers from my last job.  They all liked to party a lot, so we were at a bar dancing and making a nuisance of ourselves.  One of the guys ended up making out with this random girl and left with her.

The dream cut to a while later, when I was driving home with one of my girls.  My phone rang and it was one of the woman who was hanging out with us at the bar.  I picked up and she was like, “DID YOU GET ANY PLAY???”

I was confused so I was like, “I’m driving home, no action tonight,” but then she explained that she didn’t mean to call me, she meant to call the guy who left with the girl. The crazy thing about the dream was that when I hung up the phone, I turned ot say something to my friend who was driving the car and she had turned into the guy.  So like, I was the girl who was going home with him?

It was strange and totally in character for Harlot at that point in my life.

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Malaysian Threesome Gone Wrong

April 7, 2019
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Yikes, Peepz.  Sometimes having group sex seems like it is an awesome idea, but then it turns out to completely wreck your life.  I’ve been on the opposing end of a frying pan wielded by an angry jealous wife before, and I’m lucky that it’s never gotten any worse than that.   My way of […]

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Fap Along With Harlot: Pizza Time!

April 6, 2019
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Peepz, I haven’t eaten pizza in like a month and I’m craving it like crazy. I’ve got spinach, mushroom, sausage on the brain but I’m waiting till next Friday to indulge. Instead of giving in to my crazy carbohydrate desires right this very moment, I decided to head over to PornHub and see if I […]

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Last Years Official “Typo of the Year”

April 5, 2019
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Calico Rudasil is a feature columnist for Sssh.com, the award-winning porn site for women & couples. With over 18 years’ experience under her belt, writing about and for the adult entertainment industry, Calico qualifies as something of a Web Porn Dinosaur; similar to a tyrannosaurus, only with far more attractive arms and a less pronounced […]

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Let’s Talk About Sex on the First Date

April 4, 2019

The only person I ended up in a long term relationship that I didn’t bang on the first date was my wife.  Sometimes people read into that and think that the reason we were able to form a longstanding bond is because we didn’t finger bang each other within 5 hours of meeting, but I […]

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Non-Monogamy? There’s an App for That

April 4, 2019
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Dating sites come and go like the wind. Single people are constantly looking for the next big thing when it comes to looking for love and sex. There’s a new app, called Feeld, that claims to help out everyone looking for love, even non-monogamous couples.  I really like this idea because most dating sites and […]

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