Post image for Vinny from Jersey Shore Showers Live on Stage

Reality television made Vinny Guadagnino famous. He and his Jersey Shore cohorts partied it up a few summers in a row and pop culture couldn’t get enough of them. The men were tan, the women were sexy and everyone loved to party.

I will always take the Grumpy Cat stance on Jersey Shore because I fucking live here. I’m bitter because one of my favorite places in the world became an even bigger tourist trap. It’s annoying that people still see this place as a vacation destination for messy parties. There are plenty of people who live here who think differently though.

My wife insists that the reason that she enjoyed the show is that it was hilarious. Dudes banging chicks, chicks fighting….All the miss matches that happened because one of the cast members fell in love at the club.

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Post image for Free Press and the 18-Year-Old Content Creator

I’m thankful that the Internet was still relatively private when I was 18. While I was running around New York City in fishnets and platform heels, no one had cell phones and social media wasn’t even a thing. In order to get pictures for my AOL AIM accounts, I had to take pictures with a camera, develop them at the drug store and then have the drug store made digital copies of them for an obscene amount of money. My quick fix to that was to send physical copies of the pictures in the mail to the people who I was corresponding with.

Remembering that made my brain twitch.

Turning 18 was a big deal to me. In a few days I’ll be turning 39 and that’s also a big deal but for very different reasons. College life, driving wherever I wanted and a new found independence are so far being me in my rear-view mirror that I can barely remember turning 18. Now I’m all worried about buying a house, starting a new vanilla corporate job and making sure that my hedgehog has food.

Priorities, am I right?

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Post image for Fap Along with Harlot: Riley Nixon

My BFF is obsessed with women that have the balls to shave their heads. He loves the way super short stubble feels on his hands when he’s pushing their face down lower and lower onto his cock. When I had my side shaved, he would randomly just touch the buzzed area while we were having drinks. If anyone else did that to me, I’d be creeped out. He’s my partner in crime though, so I don’t mind.

I’ve been hyped up on Riley Nixon’s porno for a minute now, but kept forgetting to share videos with him. This Fap Along is basically for him, but I knew we’d all be able to get a bit of enjoyment out of it, so I figured I would share.

Are you Peepz ready? Set your phasers to cum and let’s get fapping!

Riley’s boss comes home early after his flight gets canceled. He catches her hanging out on the couch in a crop top and thong, which may or may not be exactly what she she wanted. He slaps her in the face with his dick a few times and she’s soaked enough to bang.

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Post image for Putting Their Heads Up Their Own Asses To Stop ‘Bottoms Up’

Calico Rudasil is a feature columnist for Sssh.com, the award-winning porn site for women & couples. With over 18 years’ experience under her belt, writing about and for the adult entertainment industry, Calico qualifies as something of a Web Porn Dinosaur; similar to a tyrannosaurus, only with far more attractive arms and a less pronounced overbite.

If you’ve ever lived in a socially-conservative area, or if you follow news relating to the adult entertainment business, then you’ve doubtlessly run across stories of cities and towns which try to prevent adult businesses from opening shop in their area.

Usually, these efforts are aimed at businesses which, whether one approves of them or not, certainly qualify as adult businesses in the sexually-explicit sense of the word ‘adult.’ You know, the usual things: adult bookstores, strip clubs, places that sell sex toys, that kind of thing.

For the powers that be in American Canyon, California, however, imposing their regulatory hammer on titty bars and porn shops evidently just wasn’t enough to satisfy their censorious zeal, evidently. No, they decided to raise (or lower, depending on one’s perspective) the bar to include…. A coffee shop with scantily-clad baristas?

Is that a Button on Your Apron, Or a Nipple-Based Violation of City Code?

To be fair, one can understand why city officials in American Canyon might want Bottoms Up to fit into the definition of “adult-entertainment business” under their local municipal code. After all, the way the shop is marketed does resemble what you’d expect to see from a strip club, complete with risqué outfits and baristas looking straight into the camera oh-so-seductively.

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Post image for Don’t Forget Your (Sex) Towel

I’ve been telling you Peepz for years that you need to have some kind of sex towel close at hand when orgasms are on the horizon. Sometimes I call it a fuck sock but I feel that it’s important to remind everyone that cleaning up after sex is super important. It’s the best kind of self care.

We have a rotation of three sex towels in our home. One says on my side of the bed, one stays on my wife’s side of the bed and the other says CLEAN and in the “linen closet” (disclaimer: we don’t actually have a linen closet. We use an under the bed plastic storage container for all of our sheets, towels, curtains, washcloths etc. One more month until we’re homeowners hopefully). There is always at least one clean sex towel in the house. It’s necessary. Only once did I fuck up and forget to was all three of the towels. If I were able to wear a neon sign over my head, it would say, “Always Pee After Sex and Keep Your Sex Towels Clean.”

It’s my mantra basically.

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Fap Along With Harlot: Property Sex

May 12, 2019
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I don’t really fully hate a lot of things in this world. Moving is definitely one of the things that I despise. Going through all of my belongings, putting them in boxes to move them a few miles away is the worst. Unboxing can be fun because you have a whole new space to work […]

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Trust Me, There Are Worse Experiences To Be Had On A Sea Cruise

May 10, 2019
Thumbnail image for Trust Me, There Are Worse Experiences To Be Had On A Sea Cruise

Calico Rudasil is a feature columnist for Sssh.com, the award-winning porn site for women & couples. With over 18 years’ experience under her belt, writing about and for the adult entertainment industry, Calico qualifies as something of a Web Porn Dinosaur; similar to a tyrannosaurus, only with far more attractive arms and a less pronounced […]

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Fap Along with Harlot: Karlee Grey

May 4, 2019
Thumbnail image for Fap Along with Harlot: Karlee Grey

Hello Peepz! It’s that time of the week again, where we all get comfy and cozy with each other and masturbate. Part of me wishes I could watch you, part of me wishes you could watch me, but for now at least we’re here on the internet. This time around, I’ve pulled five videos from […]

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Sex After Sickness

May 4, 2019
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Last Thursday, I had to get my eyes checked. Nothing was really wrong, other than the fact that it’s the time of year where I have to cough up a few hundred dollars to get new glasses. It goes with the whole “Sexy Librarian” territory of my look. The eye doctor asked me twice if […]

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Sex Ed Failed Us

May 1, 2019
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Before I started actually having sex, I knew most of what I knew from looking at dirty magazines. The Internet was around but wasn’t really present in my life until I was like 18 or 19. By that point, I was fucking and trying my best to make the sexy pictures that were embedded in […]

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