Bacon’s Bad For Your Ball Juice

by Alpha Harlot on October 16, 2013

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Want to make some babies? Put down your fork and step away from the bacon. Researchers at Harvard have discovered (though I kind of thought that this was common knowledge, but whatever. Science!) that, the healthier you eat, the healthier and more fertile your sperm are.

They conducted a study of 156 men that were involved in relationships who were having difficulty conceiving children and then quizzed them on their diets. They discovered if you eat more fish and less bacon (or processed meats in general, but bacon is king of all meats), you’re more likely to have strong little swimmers.

I feel like this might be why I’m usually attracted to people who consider bacon to be a food group. Someone, subliminally I always knew that bacon would help me out with the “Don’t Get Knocked Up Because You Can Barely Take Care of Yourself” stuff.

I also attribute that to condoms…but I’m sure that bacon helped. A tasty pop shot is nearly as delicious to me as bacon is. Nearly.

I mean, I’m definitely into dudes who eats pineapple all the time. Sweet fruit in your system leads to happy cum covered Harlots….but bacon flavored sperm is probably just as delicious.
Now I want to someone to jizz on bacon and feed it to me…I bet that would make for a delicious BLT.

Here’s some sperm filled porno to drive the point home.


SUPERFLUITY OF SPERM brought to you by PornHub

More than a mouthful is still not enough to satisfy this cum gargling babe:


Nasty blonde sperm and cock lover brought to you by PornHub

I’m not sure if anyone needed another reason to love fried pork snacks, but less chance of babies definitely does it for me.

Bacon for everyone!

Source: Bacon Lowers Sperm Count on The Age

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