Breast Appreciation Month

Like I assume all men were at some point in the past 5 minutes, I was thinking about breasts. Between their wife, girlfriend, mistress, strippers, prostitutes and porn stars most men have seen hundreds, if not thousands of titties. Doesn’t matter. I don’t know about you but I can never get tired of seeing a nice set myself. Each and every time is like the first. My inner child giggles profusely and shyly screams: It’s boobs! Hooray boobs!!!

Handfuls or mouthfuls from ant hills to the great hills. Taut and perky or big and round. Old, young, small, huge they’re all unique in their own way and have a special reserved place in my heart. You can’t go wrong with titties. What’s not to like?

From the way the way natural ones ripple and dance like clouds across the horizon to the way fake ones remain in permanent salute like fearless soldiers ready to charge into the field of battle. Both slope invitingly forward ending with that perky little nipple begging to be touched, caressed, sucked…violated?

For years women have wondered about men’s fascination with their lovely lady lumps, “They’re just breasts” they say. But that’s because women have historically and repeatedly underestimated the importance of their assets. That’s why they say crazy stuff like, “it’s just sex” or “it’s just head.”

Women’s crazy talk aside, I can stare at breasts all day long and on most occasions I do. They’re hypnotically beautiful and each sighting is an unparalleled experience all onto itself. Why the other day I was staring at a pair so hard and for so long I failed to notice they were attached to a man. But you know what, a nice set of tits is a nice set of tits. I give that shim its rightful kudos!

It’s like when life gives you lemons who gives a shit, because you know there are still titties out there you haven’t seen, yet. I mean sometimes you have to stop and feel the titties. As long as undiscovered titties remain there’s not a problem in the world you can’t overcome. Whether it’s #tittytuesday on Twitter, 2 for 1 night at the Gentlemen’s Club or another random day on Pornhub if it involves titties, Richard is hands on.

So during the month of October let us not only be breasts aware but also breasts appreciative! I know I am.

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