Naked In a Bar With a Bag of Dicks

by Alpha Harlot on January 27, 2014

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Would you go naked in public if your friends dared you to? Depending on the circumstances and who was around, I’m pretty sure that I wouldn’t. There is a time and a place for everything and sometimes people like to cross that line for reasons that are only known to them.

If you’re the type of person that likes to party with no clothes on, there are plenty of nudist resorts throughout the world that are down for clothing optional activities. Even just finding yourself a secluded part of the woods would most likely be thrilling.

It is probably not in your best interest to just take off your pants and walk into a bar with a sack of dildos in your hand. While this might seem to be common knowledge to us, sometimes amphetamine addicts see things a bit differently.

David Sherratt, who is 51 years old and full of piss and vinegar, did just that over in the UK recently. He wasn’t happy about being bottomless though, he was kind of angry and looking to fight. When he burst into the bar, he actually announced to the crowd that he was, in fact naked, and that the large bag he was carrying was full of dildos.

He then proceeded to tell the shocked crowed that if anyone had a problem with the situation, he was willing to take it outside. Since no one took him up on his offer, he went outside all by himself where the cops stepped in to regain control of the situation.

When police apprehended Sherratt, they found the sex toys, the rest of his clothes and…a whole lot of drugs in the bag. At least he didn’t toss his clothes in the dumpster or anything, I guess. When the fuzz found his stash, he admitted that he had probably taken too much.

You think?

Here are some porno situations involving bags because it’s way more sexy than anything else I could find relating to the story.

First Melina Mason stops by her bosses house to get her laptop bag and ends up showing off her sexy purple thong to her employer’s husband.

Melina Mason picks up a bag and stays to fuck her bossâ??s husband brought to you by PornHub

And here’s a hot cougar foursome with Kendra Secrets, Mika Tan, Payton Leigh and the supermarket bag boy.

Mika, Kendra and Peyton Sack The Bag Boy brought to you by PornHub

Because I’ve had nothing but jokes going through my head since I read about this story, here’s one that I found particularly amusing while I was doing some research on this crazy, naked, dildo guy…

A guy walks into a bar. He asks the bartender, “Do you have any helicopter flavored potato chips?” The bartender shakes his head and says, “No, we only have plain.”

Tell me your favorite “A guy walks into a bar,” jokes in the comments.

Source: Stokes Sentinel

If you’d like to see Alpha Harlot naked in the privacy of her own home (and sometimes outside) check out her profile on Xtube by Clicking Here

  • Dino

    Two guys walk into a bar…
    …The second one should have seen it coming.

    A priest, a rabbi, a wallstreet executive, 3 nuns, 2 roosters, and a giraffe walk into a bar…
    …The bartender looks at the group and says “What is this, a Joke?”

    • Alpha Harlot

      My go to joke when people are throwing them out there is…Two men walk into a bar, the third one ducks 😉

  • Zach Becvar

    A guy walks into a bar…
    … then a midget walks under it and laughs at the asshole rolling on the floor.

  • Darlington

    An alligator walks into a bar
    and the bar tender asks
    “why the long face?…”

    The alligator replys
    I have cancer

  • Darlington

    How do you know you’re at a Gay picknick?

    All the hotdogs taste like shit!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11

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