Sex News: Pregnant While Pregnant, Oral Sex Introduced By The Mob, & Sex Doll Brothel

by Lola Byrd on March 14, 2017

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Did you guys hear about the man who died buried under a six ton pile of dirty magazines? I was really hoping it was true, because what a way to die! Turns out it was fake news.

the New York Times has busted that myth with a crazy little piece of medical information: Actually, you can get pregnant while already pregnant, a cosmic prank known in scientific terms as “superfetation.”

“Ordinarily, the release of eggs ceases once a woman is pregnant,” the Times wrote in its Science Q&A column, “and the hormonal and physical changes of pregnancy work together to prevent another conception.” But sometimes, for reasons scientists don’t fully understand, the hormones that stop another pregnancy from occurring don’t get the memo about the first one. And even then, as Scientific American has explained, superfetation occurs if and only if a series of “seemingly impossible events” takes place: “Ovulation must take place during an ongoing pregnancy, semen must somehow find its way through the blocked cervix to the oviduct, via the occupied uterus and finally, the conceptus has to successfully implant itself in an unsuspecting already-occupied uterus.

Mind blown.

Then came an offer we couldn’t refuse. Mario Puzo’s classic novel The Godfather was published in 1969, and it made an indelible impact on American cultural life. The mobster replaced the cowboy in the popular imagination, people started talking about horse heads and “Godfather tucks” (you’ll have to Google that one), and blow jobs were, as the late Christopher Hitchens once observed in his memorable essay “As American as Apple Pie,” “suddenly for real men.” Hitchens singles out this key passage from The Godfather about mob-connected crooner Johnny Fontane:

And the other guys were always talking about blow jobs … and he really didn’t enjoy that stuff so much … He and his second wife had finally not got along, because she preferred the old sixty-nine too much to a point where she didn’t want anything else and he had to fight to stick it in. She began making fun of him and calling him a square and the word got around that he made love like a kid.

Suddenly the blow job was a hetero man’s game, even if did not suit emasculated entertainers like Fontane. And, almost as if they had decided to strike while the iron was hot, members of New York’s Colombo crime family bankrolled Deep Throat, a pornographic film shot over several days in January 1972. Though its star, Linda Lovelace, would later claim she was forced by her abusive husband to perform the deeds that would make her famous, the 61-minute film became a national sensation — and even more of a household name once the title was used to identify Woodward and Bernstein’s secret Watergate source.

Thank you Mob. Thank you.

In the first known brothel of its kind, a Barcelona establishment is offering erotic sessions with sex dolls only.

Clients of the “agency” will have to pony up $127 an hour for a sex session with one of four big-breasted Lumi Dolls: blond Kati, Asian-featured Lili, dark-skinned Leiza and anime model Aki, who wears her blue hair in ponytails.

Why sex dolls?

For one thing, the silicone dolls are expensive to own — costing at least $5,500 — not to mention embarrassing to have around the house. In addition, having sex with a doll is not, technically, cheating on a spouse.

“They are totally realistic dolls both in their movements and in their ‘feel,’ and they will allow you to fulfill all your fantasies without limits,” promises the website for the Lumi models.

Weird. I kind of want to try one, though. That’s probably not anatomically possible, but whatever. Do they have male sex dolls?

Follow Lola Byrd on Twitter @misslolabyrd

  • I’m pretty sure male sex dolls are a thing. Kind of surprised Spain was the first place to do this and not Japan.

    • I just googled “Japan Sex Laws” and the first thing that came up is that the age of consent in Japan is 13 years old, which is so damn low. So low.

      • Suddenly anime makes slightly more sense. Not much but just slightly.

  • Can’t believe I didn’t make a “Yo dog, we heard you like being pregnant so we got you pregnant while you are pregnant” joke

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