Swedish Court: Masturbating On The Beach is ‘Okay’

by Calvin Clark on April 7, 2017

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Swedish women are known throughout the world for being flagrantly attractive and sexually liberated. I would imagine going to a beach in Sweden would be an exercise in advanced boner hiding.

Unless you’re wearing a pair of snug jean shorts your only options are to remain waist deep in the ocean or to randomly find a reason to sit down every few minutes.

Or, according to a court ruling, you could just take your shorts off and masturbate openly.

The case was brought up when a 65-year-old man masturbated at a beach in Stockholm earlier this summer. Details on the incident are hard to find but it was more or a less a slam dunk case. He was arrested and charged with sexual assault and it was never in question that he masturbated in public.

However when the court failed to find a victim of this assault they had no choice but to drop all charges.

Their reasoning was that the man wasn’t directing his wanking at a specific person so it couldn’t be considered sexual assault. At most they had him disorderly conduct or public indecency but these weren’t the crimes he was charged with. According to some officials, even those charges may be a stretch.

When asked if it’s now acceptable to masturbate on the beaches in Sweden one prosecutor said it was “okay” so long as it isn’t directed at anyone. Oh, Sweden.

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