trailer

The first thing I thought when I heard the new Doctor was called Jodie Whittaker was: “Is she related to Forest Whitaker?” The second thing I thought was: “Oh, she has boobies.” I’m kidding, the first thing I thought was: “Did the first female Doctor have to be thin and blonde?” Which was closely followed by: “Peter Capaldi only got two seasons? That’s not fair. Nope, wait, it’s been three.”

To be honest, I haven’t seen the latest season of Doctor Who yet. Peter Capaldi, although a great actor, didn’t have a great first season as the Doctor. Personally, I blame that on some iffy writing and the fact that he was never paired up with a great companion. The whole Clara thing was not a good match. I actually kind of hate Clara.

Whatever, it’s hard to follow up a team like the Ponds.

That said, I was just starting to really dig Capaldi. I’m sad to see him go, but I am excited to see this new direction Doctor Who is going in. Let’s hope Jodie Whittaker brings more to the table than a nice pair of tits. I don’t know her as an actress, but by all accounts her work is stellar. She was in the critically acclaimed Broadchurch and Attack the Block, so we can only hope she kills it as the 13th Doctor.

I kind of hope the Doctor continues to be an old embittered misanthrope like Capaldi’s Doctor only in pretty packaging. I would dig that vibe, so far I’ve got to say the teaser has me intrigued, but I hope they give her a slightly better costume for the show than a black hoodie. Yawn.

CLICK FOR THE REST OF THIS POST

{ 12 comments }

I remember it well, the year was 2007 and I was in my second year of university. The internet was going wild over a video called 2 Girls 1 Cup. Friends were tricking other friends into watching said video because watching your friends and loved ones go into shocked disgust is hilarious! Hi-larious, I tell you!

After hearing about the video at school, I went home and tried to find in on Youtube, but I was late to the game and when I typed in 2 Girls 1 Cup my search results were inundated with reaction videos and it was impossible to find the original video.

To this day I still haven’t seen it, but I have seen this video of a grandma watching 2 Girls 1 Cup with growing disgust.

Who does that to their grandma?!

I’m assuming you all know what I’m talking about, even if like me you haven’t seen it, you know that when someone talks about the 2 Girls 1 Cup video they’re talking about a vid that shows two girls making out, shitting into a cup, eating said shit, and then vomiting into each other’s mouths.

Ewwwww, doesn’t even begin to explain it. Even if I did find the original vid, I don’t know that I’d want to watch it. I might not be able to stop myself, but then I’m sure I would regret it as soon as those images would permanently etch themselves into the recesses of my mind.

CLICK FOR THE REST OF THIS POST

{ 2 comments }

Okay, I’m gonna admit it. The trailer for Ghost In The Shell looks pretty amazing and Scarlett Johansson looks kickass. Sure, the whitewashing hella bothers me. I mean if you’re going to change the race of the main character why not change the setting as well? Clearly, it’s set in Japan circa 2029 and unless there’s a third world war where all the white people invade Japan it’s all a little misleading.

Okay, now that the trailer high has ebbed a little, all I can see it the whitewashing. The only Japenese people in the movie are extras.

Also, what the hell is up with ScarJo’s costume? Is she naked? Is that a beige onesie? What is happening with that outfit? I need an answer and I want it now, dammit!

scarjo-ghost-in-the-shell

Seriously, what is that? Too bad Scarlett Johansson can’t spend the whole movie naked on an operating slab. I could watch that for a couple hours without complaint. Sure, it would probably drag on after a while, but I’ve been known to find entertainment watching paint dry.*

scarjo-ghost-in-the-shell-header

It’s been a while since I’ve seen the original animated Ghost in the Shell and I never read the mangas, so the story is a little foggy in my head, so I can’t tell you how faithfull it is to the original, you know, besides the whole changing the race of the main character, WHICH IS A BIG DEAL, but this is android ScarJo boobies, so it was my duty as a fellow perv to post this trailer.

CLICK FOR THE REST OF THIS POST

{ 16 comments }

This just in. Eva Green continues to be stupid sexy. Stupid sexy for those of you wondering means that she is so beautiful that when looked upon she turns the most brilliant people into bumbling idiots. Think Medusa, except you get drooling morons instead of people turned into stone. Fact.

Eva Green’s sexy powers are so great that a promotional poster for Sin City 2 showing the silhouette of her breasts was banned and shot into oblivion… err… the Internet. Since I already covered that tidbit here, I won’t go over it again, except to say that even the silhouette of Eva’s lovely boobs had got me checking my chin for drool.

There’s just no stopping the power of Eva’s boobs, because it seems that the trailer for Sin City 2 is now under attack from the prudes of this world. ABC officially rejected the ad; boob silhouette is just too much for people to deal with. Funny how all the violence doesn’t get a mention. Maim half a dozen men, it’s all good, just don’t show the outline of a boob because that shit will traumatize the children.

Dimension, the studio producing Sin City 2, is appealing the decision. Let’s hope they win. Censorship bums me out. Seriously, the powers that be didn’t even ban the trailer because of nudity (there isn’t any), but because Eva Green ‘appears’ to be nude in two scenes.

CLICK FOR THE REST OF THIS POST

{ 11 comments }

I didn’t read the books and I have no intention to. I’ve read enough criticism of the Fifty Shades of Grey trilogy to want to stay clear of a heroine who utters “Oh My!” without an ounce of camp a la George Takei every time something scandalous happens, and if that weren’t bad enough the books are actually a horrendous representation of a dominant and submissive relationship.

Some have even gone so far as to call the book dangerous not because it uses bondage to entice but because it uses bad bondage to entice.

One thing can’t be denied, however, and that is the cultural impact the book series has had since it’s release in May 2011. People have not been able to shut up about it. And, frankly, anything that gets people reading and talking about sex is great in my opinion.

That being said, I didn’t have high hopes for the movie. I still don’t, but the trailer on the other hand is a work of art. Yup, I’m one of those weird people who enjoys watching movie trailers in-and-of-themselves. They’re short and they’re entertaining and more often than not they actually encapsulates all the best parts of a movie making the whole seem more interesting than the parts.

CLICK FOR THE REST OF THIS POST

{ 8 comments }

Sin City, I remember thee well. The year was 2005 and I was visiting my Dad and my step-mom for the weekend. They wanted to drive into the city to go see a movie and I decided to go with them. No way, I was going to sit through whatever the hell it is they wanted to watch, though. Nope, I would catch a screening of Sin City.

What a movie! When asked about my favorite movies, Sin City never comes to mind, but when I think back to that Matinee screening all I can remember is being mesmerized from start to finish. It was so damn bloody. And so damn stylish. I was entertained the whole way through and that’s saying a lot these days.

Too often, I find myself getting bored during all the “action” in action flicks, but not Sin City. I was sitting at the edge of my seat for that baby. And as soon as I got home I looked up Frank Miller. It was a good time. I couldn’t wait for the sequel. A year, I thought I would have to wait, at most?!

Riiiight. Fast forward a decade, give or take a year, and the long wait is finally over. Sin City: A Dame To Kill For is finally her. It looks alright. The trailer isn’t giving me chills, but I’m excited that the beautiful and tit-tastic Eva Green has a starring role. From what I gather the marketing team has put her assets to good use.

CLICK FOR THE REST OF THIS POST

{ 23 comments }

Don’t get too excited, it doesn’t star Adam Samberg or Justin Timberlake. Sob. It does, however, star the insanely hot MILFs Robin Wright (formely Penn) and Naomi Watts. Yay! Oh and two random cute and totally legal boys who are said mother lovers.

A borderline incestuous plot, surfing, Australian accents, angst, betrayal, sex; now, that’s my kind of movie, but Adam and Justin do a better job at explaining the plot of Adore than I do:

Oh Adam and Justin why don’t you make more videos together? We miss you. You’ve been one of the only consistently good parts of SNL for the last decade. Sigh.

Although, my favorite hunky duo aren’t reprising their mother loving roles, I am a tad excited to see if the screenwriter who adapted  Atonement did a good job when he adapted Mother Lover into the feature film Adore.

It looks promising if I do say so myself, which I clearly just did if you were paying attention. Here’s the trailer so you can see for yourself:

I do, however, expect the actual movie to feature a lot more sex and nudity. Disturbing sexual tension is good and all, but let’s face it, when you see a movie that plays with that line, but never crosses it, you leave the theater disappointed as fuck.

I’m hoping to be completely and utterly disturbed as well as aroused, got it, film people!

Via thefrisky.com – Follow Lola Byrd on Twitter @misslolabyrd

{ 79 comments }

If the title above is exciting you too much, and if you missed our previous coverage on this flick: no Lindsay Lohan is not taking James Deen big ween on camera for some skin flick, the two of them are starring in a crime thriller together called The Canyons. It’s a movie with lots of odd little factors mishmashing around it, starting with the film is starring the pornstar James Deen in his first mainstream acting role. James – that young, affable, large cocked, stud who is probably the best known male performer right now.

And it’s Lindsay Lohan’s return to the big screen after her two year stint of drugs, thievery, intoxicated driving, and legal problems. And its budget is crowdsourced from fans. Lastly it’s a joint production from novelist and screenwriter Bret Easton Ellis (of American Psycho fame) and director/screenwriter Paul Schrader (directed American Gigolo, wrote Raging Bull) working rebel style outside of the Hollywood system.

The teaser trailer is out, suck it into your brain right here, plus there’s a blink-and-you-miss-it frame of LiLo’s boob that we’ve included ‘cuz we’re classy like that:

Via DrunkenStepfather.com

{ 6 comments }

Peeperz is many things, but it isn’t a movie review blog… unless said movie is porn or some starlet shows off her tits in the latest mainstream flick… so, huh, I guess we do pimp a lot of movies, because the lady actors like to take off their tops and we just can’t get enough of those celebrity titties.

Movie 43 isn’t one of those movies, in fact, as far as I know no one famous takes off their top. To be honest, I have no fucking clue what this movie is about. Forget the plot. What I care about and what you should care about is that an epic celebrity cast: Emma Stone, Halle Berry, Kate Winslet, Hugh Jackman, Richard Gere, Anna Faris, Uma Thurman, Gerard Butler, Naomi Watts, Elizabeth Banks, Johnny Knoxville, Kristen Bell, Kate Bosworth, etc, etc, get absolutely, ridiculously filthy, and vulgar with one another.

The trailer is hilarious; in 29 seconds flat you’ve got jokes about poop, pubes,  HPV, ball obsessions, head butting leprechauns, sexy flesh robots that mangle penises, and necrophilia. All I want to do is sit here and watch the scene between Kieran Culkin and Emma Stone over and over again. And Gerard Butler playing a fuck-nuts leprechaun is pure genius.

Circle January 25th in your calendars boys and girls, because it’s going to be an incredibly funny an fucked up ride and I sure as hell ain’t going to miss it.

Check out the trailer:

Lola Byrd is on Twitter building an empire @misslolabyrd.

Via tinynibbles.com

{ 5 comments }

The Internet is so full of parodies and gag videos that when you come across something truly horrifying, it’s sometimes difficult to tell the difference between a joke and reality. That’s the problem I’m currently having with the trailer for Harmless; a Christian horror movie about the perils of pornography:

The story is about a husband and father and his battle with pornography. Actual home movies and interviews tell the story of the terror the family faces when a box of pornography is opened and something is unleashed.

I’ve seen the trailer. I’ve seen the official website. I’ve seen the Kickstarter campaign… and I still can’t quite wrap my brain around it. It seems legit, but I just can’t understand why. Why, goddammit? Why?!

Well, fuck me gently with a chainsaw, but according to the Harmless website these people decided to make a horror film about porn, because movies aren’t only entertaining they also teach people morals and values…. and porn is sooo dangerous that you can’t just tell someone they risk the very fabric of their soul when watching porn. To get your point across: “You have to tell a compelling story to catch someone’s attention and then educate them while they’re being entertained.”

Yawn, barf!

Ah yes, there’s nothing like using the whole entertainment ploy to educate people about their sinful lives. If only the movie actually contained some crazy fucked up sex scenes and more than a few scares. I’d probably be into watching it if that were the case, but going by the trailer this is just the same bullshit re-packaged as something more appealing.

Why bother? The Bible is already filled to the brim with scary monsters and the last time I checked ghostly looking chicks dressed in white with long black hair covering their faces stopped being scary after The Ring and its many incarnations.

Check out the trailer:

Kickstarter campaign video:


Via youtube.com and harmlessmovie.com

{ 5 comments }